Saturday 22 August 2015

If Only a Simple Hello Would Do

I used to think that when you have been lost once, it would be quite unlikely to find yourself lost again. It just seems ridiculous to fall into in the same dark hole that you had crawled out of in the past. But in my case, apparently, it is possible.

Many of you may have noticed that I've disappeared into thin air since early this year. A day after my birthday to be exact. So much have happened, but so little have made much impact to keep me going inside. If things happen for a reason, then I wonder why many things fail to happen when I desperately need them to. That they're not meant to be? Has the world turned a cold shoulder on me? Perhaps life is a lesson that I'm never meant to understand completely...





And yet I keep going, no matter how exhausted I am. It feels like my dreams have been drained away to the very last drops of their existence and I'm hanging onto what is left of them. I keep telling myself that I can do this, forcing the last shreds of positive thoughts I have saved away somewhere in my mind. But like all thoughts, sometimes they just fade away.





So here I am. Still trying. Still searching for a tiny ray of light that hopefully will guide me out of this darkness. Forgive me for being silent all this time. It's never easy to face your problems, let alone share it with the world. So let this be a step, hopefully towards something good.

Much love,


12 comments:

  1. Dearest Amalia
    Even the brightest light flickers at times. I know the darkness you are feeling and yet I still 'see' so much light surrounding you. Know that your gracefully exquisite art adds to the light on this planet- you are a gift.
    I wish we could sit over a cup of tea and just 'be', share some art and smiles, listen or be silent. Hugs to you during this difficult time.
    Xxoo
    Julia Christie

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    1. Dear sweet Julia,

      Thank you for your kind, kind words. I long for that simplicity in life too. Sometimes I wish I could just wake up in the morning and go on like there's no worry in the world. Hugs to you form afar. XO

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  2. My dear Amalia, no need to apologize about your silence! Life has its hard moments and dark sides. I hope they will vanish soon - like a mist, and you will open a new door, that you haven't noticed up so far... Maybe your dreams are tired? Maybe you need new, "fresh" ones! But what I can see is that you haven't lost your spirit and the zest for drawing. And your talent is your light... Be strong and may a happy smile touch your lips very, very soon!
    Oh, how adorable is that girl!!!!!!!!

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    1. Thank you, dear Rossi. Your words never fail to encourage, my friend. I love the idea of finding new dreams! How wonderful life would be if we could just hit the "refresh" button and start over. I have been pushing myself to keep creating, even though it's hard to begin something and finish it to the very end. I have so many unfinished drawings in my drawer, it's totally depressing to see. But I will keep on and do my best to never stop creating. :)

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  3. I don't really have any incouraging words expect perhaps to just keep going and perhaps things will turn out well in the end. & I hope things will work out for you.

    beautiful drawing though. hope you have a lovely day.

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    1. Just seeing you here is always encouraging, Lissa. So thank you, for your kind words. I hope the clouds will lift away soon and maybe for once I'll see blue skies again. A lovely day to you too, my friend. :)

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  4. Oh, Amalia, hello! It is so wonderful to see you again. And your gorgeous drawings, hauntingly beautiful as ever. She's got a lot of soul and melancholy in her eyes. Are they a reflection of yours? I'm saddened to hear of your turmoil. But seeing you again brightened my day, and I hope knowing that you inspire and awe others is enough to fan that flicker of hope into a full flame. Sending you so much love and good thoughts, dear friend.

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    1. Oh Bella, seeing you here brightened my day too! It's a very rare occasion these days, but reading these messages have brought such a warm feeling inside that's been missing lately. I'm glad I decided to write this post, at least I know my friends are still here. XO

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  5. hello dear Amalia,
    my heart leaned towards you when i saw your post on my sidebar, leap with happiness.
    your drawing is so lovely, overflowing with feeling. I am sorry to hear that you have had such a long stretch of time that does not feel good. sometimes it is encouraging to remember that things change give enough time. mustering the courage to be with what is being the challenge. I wish you a sweet breeze that refreshes your world, thoughts, feelings and more; making space for newness that feels good, so very good to you. Sending light and love.

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    1. Lovely Tammie,

      Your words are a soothing breeze to my heart...thank you, dear one. I'm so lucky to have such wonderful friends here in Blogland, and your friendship is a treasured one, always. I will do my best to push aside all the heavy shadows surrounding me and hopefully I will come out of this wiser. Much love to you. XO

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  6. Dear Amalia,
    I have kept your blog on my side bar for several years now, because of your lovely artwork and creations. They are so precious and beautiful; your gifts and talents are a wonderful inspiration to me. I too have found myself quite behind in the blogging world of late, struggling for inspiration and heart… so many things going on, and trying to stay on top of it. The world itself is not what it used to be, I do believe that many of us feel its groaning. We so often need that help from above to shake off those things that try to pull us down; I am saying a prayer for you today, so sorry about your struggles. May you walk in victory, joy and peace. Thank you for sharing all of your lovely creations, and even your struggles.
    Hugs, Pam

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    1. Dearest Pam,

      Thank you so much, your kind words really touched me. It's been so hard to keep going when so many things are dragging me down. But I am thankful that this tiny haven of blogland remains to be a place where people seek for a little kindness and meet lovely friends that understand their troubles. XO

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Tell me your lovely daydreams, they always make me smile! ♥